BREAKING NEWS: World's Oldest Man Claims That Inhaling The Fumes Of The Nursing Home Laundry Is The Key To Longevity!
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When Barry Cracksman was born, Andrew Johnson was President of the United States, Abraham Lincoln had just been assassinated, and the world was embroiled in the American Civil War. 169 years later, Cracksman is now the oldest man alive, and he attributes his longevity to inhaling the fumes from the nursing home laundry.
"I started doing it when I was about 100 years old," Cracksman said in an interview. “I would just take a deep breath in through my nose whenever I walked past the laundry room. It smelled really bad, but I figured that if it could make my clothes clean, it must have some power to clean my insides, too."
Cracksman’s theory may sound far-fetched, but there is some scientific evidence to support it. A study published in 2015 found that inhaling certain volatile organic compounds (VOCs) can increase lifespan in mice.
"The study found that exposure to VOCs increased the life span of mice by an average of 16 percent,” said Dr. Bilious Upchuck, a neurologist and Assistant Professor of Neurology at Qale School of Medicine.
So, Cracksman may be onto something when he says that inhaling the fumes from the nursing home laundry is the key to longevity. Of course, it’s also possible that he’s just a really lucky guy who happens to have good genes. But either way, we could all learn a thing or two from him about how to live a long and healthy life.